Here's a video that you might want to see. It articulates, in a brief clip, the connections between the social/economic disaster that our culture has permitted, and the psychological/spiritual foundations of a sane society. Have a look.
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Tuesday, November 22, 2011
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
Trauma 101, Part Three
So we have some context. Nothing happens in a vacuum, does it. No one is immune from the effects of his/her culture, even though many people believe that they are. And this applies whether that culture is one's country, one's religion, one's family, one's social network, one's vocation, one's friends, one's economic class.
But let's take these in turn, or the whole thing can become a bit overwhelming. People are used to thinking in terms of family when they think of psychotherapy, and this is for some good reasons, of course. We are born, most immediately, into a family context (defining "family" rather loosely), and it is this immediate and original context that will have some of the most influential effects on us. Some of the most personal effects. Even though the family is a carrier of the culture(s) within which one operates, a microcosm of the macrocosm of larger culture, the relationships between family members is the most intimate and effectual, right from the start. We are fed, cleaned, warmed, protected - or we are not - by some person or persons who constitute our original "family". We are completely dependent, incapable of survival without this connection.
Child rearing practices vary. Relationship dynamics vary. Mother/child and father/child norms vary. Expectations vary. Values vary. Ideas about what constitutes health and propriety and right and wrong vary. A look at some of the historically normal treatments of children in Western culture might suggest that children - like women - have been considered possessions,
liabilities or assets, depending on what work they could or could not be put to, just another mouth to feed, sent out to fend for themselves or to contribute to the family's survival as soon as possible. This sort of thing has multiple and often damaging implications.
We are accustomed to giving great lip service to the value and care of children, but the realities seem to tell the true story of our basic values. We dump our children into industrialized pre and public schools even before they can sit up on their own. We chronically under fund our public educational system and under pay our children's teachers. We squirm at the thought of providing basic, decent housing, health care, food or higher education to our children. Etc., etc., etc. Just look at where the money in our society goes, and where it does not go, and the value system we operate by becomes pretty clear.
All of this has profound implications for families, and thereby for children, and thereby for you and for me. I'm calling the value system that we operate by a system of inherent trauma. A value system that inherently traumatizes. A value system that undermines the fundamental psychological, emotional and spiritual needs of all of us. And we are all effected deeply, and negatively, by this.
mdavid-lpcc.com
But let's take these in turn, or the whole thing can become a bit overwhelming. People are used to thinking in terms of family when they think of psychotherapy, and this is for some good reasons, of course. We are born, most immediately, into a family context (defining "family" rather loosely), and it is this immediate and original context that will have some of the most influential effects on us. Some of the most personal effects. Even though the family is a carrier of the culture(s) within which one operates, a microcosm of the macrocosm of larger culture, the relationships between family members is the most intimate and effectual, right from the start. We are fed, cleaned, warmed, protected - or we are not - by some person or persons who constitute our original "family". We are completely dependent, incapable of survival without this connection.
Child rearing practices vary. Relationship dynamics vary. Mother/child and father/child norms vary. Expectations vary. Values vary. Ideas about what constitutes health and propriety and right and wrong vary. A look at some of the historically normal treatments of children in Western culture might suggest that children - like women - have been considered possessions,
liabilities or assets, depending on what work they could or could not be put to, just another mouth to feed, sent out to fend for themselves or to contribute to the family's survival as soon as possible. This sort of thing has multiple and often damaging implications.
We are accustomed to giving great lip service to the value and care of children, but the realities seem to tell the true story of our basic values. We dump our children into industrialized pre and public schools even before they can sit up on their own. We chronically under fund our public educational system and under pay our children's teachers. We squirm at the thought of providing basic, decent housing, health care, food or higher education to our children. Etc., etc., etc. Just look at where the money in our society goes, and where it does not go, and the value system we operate by becomes pretty clear.
All of this has profound implications for families, and thereby for children, and thereby for you and for me. I'm calling the value system that we operate by a system of inherent trauma. A value system that inherently traumatizes. A value system that undermines the fundamental psychological, emotional and spiritual needs of all of us. And we are all effected deeply, and negatively, by this.
mdavid-lpcc.com
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
Trauma 101, Part Two
This is by way of pointing to the unidentified, every day traumas that we routinely experience as an integral aspect of the culture in which we live. I was once asked what I thought the most common unidentified trauma in American society was. I didn't have a ready answer, but the questioner suggested that it was medical trauma. You know, those routine and not-so-routine medical and dental procedures that we've all experienced throughout our lives. Those assaults to the body-mind that we're not supposed to be bothered by. (The one that comes immediately to my mind as one of the most disturbing medical traumas that I've experienced in the last few years is a prostate biopsy. When I asked the urologist who would perform the procedure if it would be painful, he said no, it wouldn't be any worse than a rubber band snapped on your wrist. Why then was I unable to sit up on the table when the chipper nurse assistant said "You can get up now"?. My reply was "No, I can't").
Having a tooth pulled or a cavity filled. Any surgery. Pokings and proddings of one kind or another. "Screenings" of various kinds. Of course, there are any number of other, non-medical every day traumas that we live with. I might suggest that even the very pace of life in the modern industrialized/digitized/cyberized world is itself traumatic. Have you ever stopped to think about the effects on your body-mind-spirit of driving your box of metal on the high speed freeways? We simply assume that this is somehow "healthy". But what kinds of psychic, mental, physical, emotional and spiritual adaptations are required in order to be able to do this regularly? And is it possible that at least some of these adaptations can be understood as traumatic? I would say yes.
This doesn't get close to the nature of intimate family relations, for example, which, given our cultural values and priorities, tend strongly, in my opinion, toward being abusive, neglectful, injurious, and, yes, traumatic. Yet we take this all for granted. We assume that our cultural mores are healthy. After all, isn't this the land of the free and the home of the brave? Isn't America (for example; the kinds of things I'm talking about seem to be at least somewhat universal) the best country on the planet? Isn't it the land of opportunity; the destination of the planet's disenfranchised, poverty stricken, sick, rejected and oppressed? And as the entire world has become Americanized, as our culture has become the model of desirability for the rest of the world ("The American way of life MUST be preserved!", we were told by our illustrious Secretary of Defense upon the impending invasion of Iraq), as the levels of industrial and consumer waste and environmental destruction have grown exponentially around the world, as the levels of air, water, and atmospheric pollution have risen to planet-obliterating proportions, are we still willing to assume that our "norms" are healthy?
mdavid-lpcc.com
Having a tooth pulled or a cavity filled. Any surgery. Pokings and proddings of one kind or another. "Screenings" of various kinds. Of course, there are any number of other, non-medical every day traumas that we live with. I might suggest that even the very pace of life in the modern industrialized/digitized/cyberized world is itself traumatic. Have you ever stopped to think about the effects on your body-mind-spirit of driving your box of metal on the high speed freeways? We simply assume that this is somehow "healthy". But what kinds of psychic, mental, physical, emotional and spiritual adaptations are required in order to be able to do this regularly? And is it possible that at least some of these adaptations can be understood as traumatic? I would say yes.
This doesn't get close to the nature of intimate family relations, for example, which, given our cultural values and priorities, tend strongly, in my opinion, toward being abusive, neglectful, injurious, and, yes, traumatic. Yet we take this all for granted. We assume that our cultural mores are healthy. After all, isn't this the land of the free and the home of the brave? Isn't America (for example; the kinds of things I'm talking about seem to be at least somewhat universal) the best country on the planet? Isn't it the land of opportunity; the destination of the planet's disenfranchised, poverty stricken, sick, rejected and oppressed? And as the entire world has become Americanized, as our culture has become the model of desirability for the rest of the world ("The American way of life MUST be preserved!", we were told by our illustrious Secretary of Defense upon the impending invasion of Iraq), as the levels of industrial and consumer waste and environmental destruction have grown exponentially around the world, as the levels of air, water, and atmospheric pollution have risen to planet-obliterating proportions, are we still willing to assume that our "norms" are healthy?
mdavid-lpcc.com
Monday, November 14, 2011
Trauma 101, Part One
Well, it's been a long while since I've posted anything. It now seems like there's something about getting "back to basics" that's important in making a new blog entry. The basic theme that I refer to is that of trauma and its effects, as well as the virtually ubiquitous nature of emotional, physical, and spiritual trauma in our culture. I see it as the elephant in the living room that doesn't get mentioned. Or, perhaps it's more like the unnoticed object which is hidden in plain sight. It's so "normal" that we don't identify it for what it is. Rather, we surround it with priorities, values, expectations and accepted norms so that it disappears from view. If it effects nearly everyone, it goes unnoticed as anything other than what's ordinary. We lose any reference point which would allow it to stand out from the background. The emperor is stark naked indeed, while we all insist that he is wearing the most stunning new set of clothes.
Boys don't cry. Girls are emotional. Families keep their private business to themselves. Spare the rod and spoil the child. Don't be so sensitive. Everything you need to know is in a literal interpretation of the authoritarian version of the Bible. An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth. Patriotism means my country right or wrong, before all else. National geographic boundaries and borders are to be taken very seriously. Police are here to protect us. What's good for business is good for America. Right and wrong are obvious and simple, and something we can all agree upon. Etc.
A friend of mine who is a retired journalist, and with whom I frequently disagree about the importance of following the latest news reports, replied with "that's not considered news" when I pointed out that all we seem to get from the media is negative information, while there of course are other things going on in the world - positive, inspiring things. These other things are "not considered news" by our illustrious media, and are therefore not reported. Just take a moment to consider the implications of this "norm". It isn't difficult to see what a constant barrage of horror, war, violence, greed, corruption, crime, brutality, scandal, and other forms of power grabbing and self indulgence might produce. Did I say "might"? Sorry. I mean to say
"will".
This alone is a form of psychic trauma that we live with every day, simply by keeping up on the news. Do we call it that? Of course not. Do we recognize it for what it is? No. Do we take steps to protect ourselves from it? Mostly, we do not. Culturally we do not. In fact we do the opposite. Like my friend, we believe it is important to continue to abuse ourselves with this important information. We need to "know". We need to be informed. It's our civic duty. And so who in their right mind would suggest that we are being repeatedly traumatized by reading/watching/listening to the important news of the day? Nonsense.
mdavid-lpcc.com
Boys don't cry. Girls are emotional. Families keep their private business to themselves. Spare the rod and spoil the child. Don't be so sensitive. Everything you need to know is in a literal interpretation of the authoritarian version of the Bible. An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth. Patriotism means my country right or wrong, before all else. National geographic boundaries and borders are to be taken very seriously. Police are here to protect us. What's good for business is good for America. Right and wrong are obvious and simple, and something we can all agree upon. Etc.
A friend of mine who is a retired journalist, and with whom I frequently disagree about the importance of following the latest news reports, replied with "that's not considered news" when I pointed out that all we seem to get from the media is negative information, while there of course are other things going on in the world - positive, inspiring things. These other things are "not considered news" by our illustrious media, and are therefore not reported. Just take a moment to consider the implications of this "norm". It isn't difficult to see what a constant barrage of horror, war, violence, greed, corruption, crime, brutality, scandal, and other forms of power grabbing and self indulgence might produce. Did I say "might"? Sorry. I mean to say
"will".
This alone is a form of psychic trauma that we live with every day, simply by keeping up on the news. Do we call it that? Of course not. Do we recognize it for what it is? No. Do we take steps to protect ourselves from it? Mostly, we do not. Culturally we do not. In fact we do the opposite. Like my friend, we believe it is important to continue to abuse ourselves with this important information. We need to "know". We need to be informed. It's our civic duty. And so who in their right mind would suggest that we are being repeatedly traumatized by reading/watching/listening to the important news of the day? Nonsense.
mdavid-lpcc.com
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